The act of gift-giving in Japan is considered a very friendly and thoughtful gesture that helps maintain harmony among various social relationships. Whether that be with friends, relatives, neighbors, colleagues, superiors at work or even business clients, gift-giving is highly regarded and regularly practiced.
When and what to give
One of the most common opportunities for gift-giving in Japan is travel. Whether you are going to see someone living far away or returning from a vacation, it’s a good idea to bring a perishable gift from where you’ve been. This kind of gift is called omiyage, and you’ll find train stations and airports full of potential candidates. If you’ve taken time off work to go on a trip, bringing back omiyage for your colleagues is a nice gesture that silently conveys “Sorry if my absence caused you any inconvenience, and thank you for covering for me while I was away” (or something to that effect).
Other traditional gift-giving periods include summer and new years, but these are often business traditions to express gratitude (sensing a theme yet?) rather than between friends and family. In addition, people often give gifts to their new neighbors when they move house, especially if they plan to be there long-term; in these cases, perishables or household goods (e.g. dish soap, dish towels, etc.) are preferred.
While omiyage generally take the form of some kind of sweet or snack, birthday or anniversary gifts can be anything — flowers, accessories, personal items, etc.
Returning the favor
There is one major unspoken rule with gift-giving though: Once you’ve received something, you are expected to return the favor in some way. It’s called “o-kaeshi.” This is especially true among neighbors who often bring each other gifts from travels or homemade foods to maintain a certain level of interaction and, of course, harmony within the community, although such practices are now more common in the countryside compared with major cities.
O-kaeshi is expected not only for physical gifts but also for favors and hospitality, such as hosting a friend from out of town or holding a dinner party. Don’t worry, you don’t need to provide exactly the same experience in return, but some gesture or present to show your appreciation will go a long way. If someone is hosting you at their house, don’t come empty-handed!
Although it may take some extra mental notes to remember to return the favor if it’s not your usual custom, there’s an upside as well: If you give gifts or show hospitality, expect good things coming your way too.
FAQ
- What kind of gifts are appreciated in Japan?
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In general, perishables such as snacks or sweets are the most widely acceptable kind of gift. For close friends and family, just about anything — that you think they will like, of course — will do.
- Do gifts need to be wrapped?
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Gifts should look presentable, with a smart paper bag being more common than flashy wrapping paper. Luckily, most omiyage (perishable souvenirs from trips) are already beautifully and individually packaged, making extra wrapping or bagging unnecessary.
- What should I do if I receive a gift in Japan?
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In the moment, say “thank you” — in the medium-term, return the favor. This could take the form of omiyage (souvenir) from your next trip, a beautifully packaged snack or sweet, or returning a kind gesture.
- Do I need to return favors as well as physical gifts?
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In general, yes. If someone is hosting you at their house, bringing a perishable gift with you is considered good manners. For other favors, your return gift/favor could take place over the near or medium term.