When visiting any country, it’s important to do some prior research on local manners so that you don’t accidentally offend anyone. Of course, there is a reasonable amount of leniency for international visitors as they can’t be expected to know everything. With that said, if I had to choose two rules in the context of dining that you should definitely know before coming to Japan, it would be the ones below.
Never stand your chopsticks upright in a bowl of rice (or any type of food for that matter)
This is one of those taboo acts that’s not just rude but also offensive, because it resembles the way rice is offered to the deceased. During funerals or memorial services in Japan, a bowl of rice with chopsticks stuck in it vertically is placed as an offering to the spirits of the departed. The act is performed at a deathbed or in front of a deceased person’s photograph on a Buddhist altar. So, when you’re not using your chopsticks, place them horizontally on the chopstick rest, or if not available, on top of your bowl or plate.
Do not pass food from chopsticks to chopsticks
This may be intuitive (and therefore tempting) to do if you’re sharing food with friends, but always place the portion on their (or a spare) plate, instead of passing it directly between two sets of chopsticks. In a similar essence to the first rule, this taboo act resembles the way cremated remains are transferred to an urn.
If you find it difficult to use chopsticks, there’s absolutely no shame in asking for a fork or spoon. In addition to the fact that any reasonable person would want you to use whatever you find most comfortable, it also eliminates the risk of you pushing yourself and then accidentally doing something taboo.
Learn more about chopstick etiquette in Japan: https://www.japanlivingguide.com/living-in-japan/culture/chopstick-etiquette/